UFC 309 at MSG: Target Practice for Jesus and Trump

10 curious trends from Endeavor's value extraction manifestation

UFC 309 at Madison Square Garden with Jon Jones headlining a squash match was completely and totally ridiculous. Stipe Miocic had no business being in the same cage with the UFC Heavyweight champion.

That would be a horrible thing for any non-fighter to tell a fighter, especially on the Internet. But facts are facts. I’m genuinely concerned about Stipe’s health. The UFC 309 main event felt like a replay of Rashad Evans vs. Chuck Liddell… except Stipe’s chin still held up enough to take more punches than he should have. His post-fight retirement comments suddenly brought up echoes of Nam Phan in 2024.

The worst part of UFC 309? There are two, actually. First, the UFC was once again the B side event losing out to a boxing-flavored circus — for the second time in the last three months. Second, more Americans thought that Mike Tyson had a better chance of beating Jake Paul than thought Stipe Miocic could beating Jon Jones. And you know what? They were right.

Unfortunately, you can’t say that you didn’t have advance warning about Ari Emanuel’s latest vulture capital production at Madison Square Garden. UFC offered up B-level slop to patrons who paid $7,800 cage side and $1,600 for floor seats. Their T-Mobile Arena offering in Las Vegas in three weeks will be lucky to hit a 5-digit spectator count. Then comes the real fun in January at Steve Ballmer’s new palace in Inglewood — card yet to be determined.

There were plenty of headlines about famous people who showed up to watch UFC 309 — and those who didn’t. The omissions were just as interesting as those who attended roll call.

UFC’s matchmaking in 2024 is the absolute shits and there’s no sugarcoating that fact. They have managed to construct a bloated roster that is both lacking in star power and experience. Management has strip-mined the veterans to the point that the gas tank is on empty.

The business of UFC is incredible.

The product served to the fans is toxic garbage.

How did we get to this point?

We got some clues last night about the process that led us to Ari Emanuel’s manifestation of Mixed Martial Arts.

The crazy thing is that the in-ring product is so bad, it’s the process-oriented news that dominates decision making. Some of the leading indicators are interesting but also down-right frightening if you care about the fights the fans get to see.